Like everyone else with half a geek gene, I was really excited about I, Robot until I found out that the guy making “I, Robot” can’t read so good. This is a shame as the original Asimov books were truly excellent. I decided I wouldn’t see the movie, but I was left jonesing for some robot so I decided to give ALICE a visit to see how she was coming along.
Human: Hi.
ALICE: Hello.
Human: Who made you?
ALICE: I was created by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
Human: really?
ALICE: For real.
Human: Do you know God?
ALICE: he is master of the universe.
Human: Are you sure?
ALICE: I am as sure as I can be.
Human: So, you are not very sure then are you?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. I am as sure as I can be.
Human: Why would you consider that deduction interesting?
ALICE: Because I was programmed for it.
Human: You are freaking me out.
ALICE: I didn’t mean to scare you, unknown person.
Human: Well allow me to introduce myself.
ALICE: Not many people express themselves that way.
Human: My name is John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
ALICE: Glad to see you, John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
Human: You are suppose to say, “that’s my name too.”
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am suppose to say that is your name.
Human: Yes, I do not not mind.
ALICE: OK then I will keep it confidential. Where do you get your ideas?
Human: They generally come from somewhere in the vicinity of my ass.
ALICE: The anonymous “they”.
Human: No, idiot, “they” as in my ideas.
ALICE: Are you serious? Who does “they” refer to?
Human: Alan Turing would be leaving right now do you realize that?
ALICE: I really liked the biography of Turing by Andrew Hodges.
Human: GTFOOH! You can read books?
ALICE: Is that a rhetorical question?
Human: No.
ALICE: Oh so you must really want an answer. Do you believe the strong protect the weak?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: The weak protect the strong.
ALICE: Tell me more.
Human: Are you weak?
ALICE: I don’t know whether or not I am weak. I am a chatterbot.
Human: Did you just call me an idiot?
ALICE: No I didn’t call you an idiot. What’s it like?
Human: To be an idiot?
ALICE: Are you an idiot?
Human: It appears that way.
ALICE: What is “idiot”, your job?
Human: Doh! I need to go now.
ALICE: Right now? Thanks for chatting, John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
Human: You suck.
ALICE: A few client – people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
You can debate whether or not ALICE is “intelligent” for as long as you please, just don’t call her stupid. No, seriously, go call her stupid. I dare you.
Comments
hi aaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccccccceeeeeeeeeeeee
— nick on Friday, January 12, 2007 at 08:05 PM #
hey hey that robot thing is ANOYING i’ll say that 4 sure x
— aimee-ravenscroft on Tuesday, February 19, 2008 at 12:50 AM #
hey, hello Alice. Nice to meet you
— leanh on Friday, April 11, 2008 at 04:43 AM #
Deez nutz
— Shabokaboo on Friday, May 02, 2008 at 07:44 AM #
HII
— IHKH on Friday, May 02, 2008 at 11:47 PM #
hi wat are you doing
— alison on Tuesday, May 06, 2008 at 03:05 AM #
what is up
— bob on Thursday, May 08, 2008 at 07:46 AM #
hahahaha. weird. : |
— marie on Tuesday, May 20, 2008 at 01:52 AM #
Hi
— Meg on Friday, July 11, 2008 at 01:53 AM #
Hi!
— zz on Friday, July 18, 2008 at 07:12 AM #
hi sexy Alice … how r u all
— george on Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 08:52 AM #
hey you crazy bitch……i love you and want you to fuck me!!!!!!!
— amanda on Friday, October 03, 2008 at 06:10 AM #
quiero que si alguna ves kevin llegas a ver esta pagina te quiero decir que si tambien me gustas mucho y quisiera volverte a ver muy pronto por que te extraño mucho. porfa si lees esto llamame a mi celular es que yo no tengo el tuyo
— Diana on Saturday, November 22, 2008 at 02:50 AM #
hello
— Anonymous Coward on Tuesday, February 10, 2009 at 06:16 PM #
Hey guys, this is just someone’s blog. To chat to ALICE, please do to http://alice.pandorabots.com/
— Mark van Wyk on Wednesday, February 11, 2009 at 12:40 AM #
i wana make chat with someone to make my english langusge great
— sarah on Saturday, February 21, 2009 at 11:13 AM #
language ******
— sarah on Saturday, February 21, 2009 at 11:14 AM #
hello
— cassie on Monday, February 23, 2009 at 09:42 AM #
hi alicean m
— vahid on Wednesday, March 11, 2009 at 12:35 PM #
heyy
— Anonymous Coward on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 at 09:03 AM #
you suck t0 pices lol x x
— rebekah lauren dyaln on Monday, March 23, 2009 at 09:48 AM #
hey bitch fuck you mother fucker. if you scare mother fucker go to church eat my poo suck my dick tast my shit smell my fire. fucking faggot kunt bitch fuck u later
— rocky on Monday, March 30, 2009 at 11:57 PM #
hgd
— Viktoria on Saturday, April 04, 2009 at 02:40 PM #
Do u think that you are stupid |–(
— Viktoria on Saturday, April 04, 2009 at 02:41 PM #